We came, we sat, we waited. Nahshi and Shmulik talked to Yusuf from Gaza on his cell phone, Hayuta perused a book of songs by Yotam Reuveni and occasionally shared a song that she found interesting and I went to collect chairs from among the trees.
So I also came to see the olive tree planted about 4 years ago, after one of our first encounters, by hopeful participants – its condition as the state of our hope: a thin trunk, no leaves, almost dead-dry and from below protrude a few green leaves that do not develop. When he dares to develop a little, a war round or fire comes and returns him to a state of survival. Even we who used to water him at the end of every session, are already letting him fight alone.
At a quarter to three, 4 private cars stopped in front of the sulfur plant. Out of them came about ten hikers and listened to an explanation. As usual in the procedure, we invited them for coffee. At the end of the explanation five of them arrived and for a moment a young Bedouin guy who passed quietly, tempted to drink coffee, sat down and continued to pass. Then another guy on an off-road bike also stopped next to us who hesitantly joined the circle and tried to dodge before speaking, without success.
As usual, in Rami’s absence, I obey the movement order (Shmulik’s movement with the hand that means, start before they run away) and burst into explanation about us. Trying to sound as logical and considered as possible (after all, you see in the eyes of the guests that their basic premise is, what is this hallucination?). I have a feeling that as time goes on in the reality of the area, the guests sitting with us by chance, (i.e., did not plan to get to the “lighthouse” but just for a walk) present more and more mainstream opinions that today is drifting strongly to the right. Therefore, it is difficult to sound “logical and considerate” in presenting the rationale of the “lighthouse”. I’m still trying, until I’ll dismissed in a blessed coup.
After me, Hayuta speaks: she occasionally comes to strengthen and feel human. Presents herself as less idealistic than “these doodes” (a circumferential hand movement in our direction). Comes less with political consciousness and more to strengthen the human spirit.
Nahshi as his custom opens and says that Gaza is neighbors, friends from the past and there is a telephone connection. Now, he says, when people go out to work, it gives hope to friends in Gaza as well. Tells about someone from Gaza who came to his kibutz as a child to work and after a break of several years, returned to work as a grandfather to his grandchildren. The man works in the kibutz even though he is exposed to small harassments by the local patriots. The “lighthouse” is the connection, in terms of Nahshi, with people who suffer there even on a daily basis and especially during periods of war rounds. He understands well the meaning of untreated trauma as happens in the Gaza Strip. Came to remind himself that there are peace-seekers like us and the last decades is an anomaly. Do not want it to be a model for the future.
Bluma asks Nahshi if he wants to influence the situation and answers herself – she can not influence the situation, if she talks about Gaza, people will think, what does she want from our lives. Gaza could be Singapore of the Middle East, she says. We take care of them and she sees convoys of trucks bringing things to Gaza. We do and try, but they have no answers. The seniors there live in villas and have bank accounts abroad and are very wealthy. Why do they not raise themselves? Do not see a desire in them to improve the situation.
Tzila says that there is no place in the world that receives like the Palestinians help from the world. They even have UNRWA – an aid organization specific to them. They do not want to lift themselves up. For her Gaza is a curse.
For Shmulik (the guest), Gaza is memories. Remember trips and shopping on the way to friends in the “Yamit” settlements. Did not feel like an occupier. Did not roam like an arrogant man in their streets. Shmulik sees no remedy for the situation. Their economic situation does not contribute to resolving the conflict, although we do not act correctly either.
Ehud says Gaza will never be Singapore because that is where hatred rules by force. Most of the residents are poor. Whoever wants peace and tries to act, will not last long.
Ze’evik thinks that Gaza is a terrible tragedy and a complete lack of understanding of the Jews what is happening in the area and what needs to be done. It is impossible to look at Gaza in isolation from other regimes in the region. We have not been able to help and understand. They are unable to change because this is the Middle Eastern Muslim culture. In Rahat (he lives near) there is no day without shots. We Jews have not been educated to change our view to the West anymore. We did not invest in education and development and did not understand their situation. Everything that happens in the Negev is part of the story that the State of Israel has not been able to understand. Our chances of survival are declining. Extremes like the parade of flags and they response, do not contribute. If we do not understand, on both sides, the situation, nothing will improve. Violence within their society is part of a culture. Our only chance and theirs is the rule of women! Women need to lead!
Shmulik (ours) as his custom opens with “I am a communist.” Believes that the abnormal situation needs to change. A prison of over 2 million people must explode sometime. The processes on each side are processes of extremism. Although he sees trucks passing through Gaza, he says “the handful will not replete the lion”. Literacy in Gaza is among the highest in the Arab world and it can contribute to the advancement of understanding. He calls his sitting in the “lighthouse” a conscientious laundry. That’s the least he can do.
Gideon, the man and the bicycle, says that according to the findings, Gaza was Jewish during the time of Alexander Yanai. It is not clear to him why there are those in the country who express compromising positions. He gives examples of our great contribution to the lives of Palestinians (I did not have time to list them all) after the 1967 war. For example, a threefold decrease in infant mortality, building universities and more. All that has changed because of some extremists there. The situation after 1967 was ideal for both sides but not slapped, mostly by the other side. He said, got on his bike and continued on his way.
Then we dispersed.
Participants: Hayuta, Bluma, Tzila, Gideon, Ehud, Shmulik, Nahshi, Shmulik, Ze’evik, Oded and a young man who just drank coffee and did not say his name.
Wrote: Oded.

Jeff arrived, he had not been at the lighthouse for almost 3 years. He does not know Ofek and Moshe who have recently been coming regularly. Keren also arrived, for the first time. She came with her mother Neta – a good woman we all know. In order for everyone to get to know, we started a “circle”.
I start. No need to explain about the “lighthouse”, we all know. I present a non-optimistic point of view, the reality is harsh. The good part for me is my ability to bring personal resources (mostly time and money) to drip my drop into the sea of reality which is huge and difficult.
Roni makes sure to concentrate on her actions and not deal with “what they do”. For her, a person is a person and when he suffers he needs help. It’s getting harder and harder. She recalls what Professor Leibowitz said and wrote after the 1967 war, accurately predicting the future, that is, our present today. 35 years ago, she met the Qatari ambassador in Egypt. He wanted to see a picture from Israel. She showed him a picture of children in an anemone field. He asked her if she was okay with what was happening in Israel. She told him it was hurting her what was happening. And that was 35 years ago.
Mark returned from Cyprus, the family celebrated his birthday. They had a culinary tour with an Israeli woman who has lived there for 10 years. Visited a man with a carob orchard who produces 7 liters of carob syrup every day. Meet more people who live simple lives and produce from what the land gives. Remembering our situation, he asked himself why we have such a complicated life when we can live simply. Yet he lives here. Can not get rid of it. Sees cops beating mourners carrying a coffin for burial. At another funeral, the cemetery is attacked. The Minister in charge, from the Labor Party. It does not give him rest. Feeling helpless. If there are elections, it will be worse. He can not be optimistic. Thinks that if he had been a Palestinian, he would probably have had to resort to violence. In his opinion we are close to another round of violence
Nahshi shares in despair and frustration when he sees the people and the country flying down the slope. People he meets on a daily basis, people he appreciates in many areas, are completely different from him in looking at the anomaly of the occupation. Most Israelis not only think this is the current state of affairs, they are also unwilling to give the alternative a chance. But Nahshi is also optimistic: Still, there are few people who see the situation like him. There are also members in Gaza who maintain contact and a desire for normalcy. Now everyone is happy with the Palestinians’ departure for work. They are highly valued in the workplace. In his opinion, there is no situation that will forever remain such a bad situation. That must change. There will be more difficulties, but by logic this must change. Prefers to stay on the side of optimism and here, in “Lighthouse”, this is one of the places where he feels hope.
Moses had an interesting morning. He wanted to know what the temperature would be today and checked on Google. He went on to check with the neighbors and “discovered” the names of the settlements on the other side of the fence in front of his plece. On Google Map they are so close. A small step for Moshe, a big step for knowing the environment! He tells another anecdote from the last week: At the entrance to the university there was an Arab guy in front of him who took him 7 minutes to enter! Moshe was not asked anything and he entered immediately. The examiner was a Bedouin.
Before Ofek speaks, Jeff asks him to tell how he got here and why he decided to keep coming.
Ofek recounts: He traveled with friends and was invited for coffee. Wanted to decline the invitation, but his friend was intrigued. The circle that day was discounted by Mark. It was winter and there were also Shmulik and Hayuta. In subsequent meetings he said he kept coming because such a discourse he had not heard until now. In the environment in which he lives, Gaza is not talked about like that.
Jeff speaks English spiced with biblical proverbs in Hebrew. It is difficult for me to translate for myself and write at the same time. He talks a lot and in summary you have about 20% of the things he said: every time he comes here he learns something new. Today he learned that there are man-eating flies. Learn a lot here. He plans to be president of the United States in 6 years and says that in his coronation speech he will quote things he learned here at the Lighthouse. Roni with her ability to love neighbors despite suffering makes her a “rabbi” to him. He does not forget the first time he was here. There was a conversation with people in Gaza and there were people here who were very surprised that it happened. He met an Israeli who took part in one of the wars. He shook his hand and said “thank you for continuing my fight”. Jeff speaks with great love of Radir. He calls her “my twin”. Her values are the same as his.
Keren makes a pre- military service for the community. Instead of military service she will do national service. Part of the decision not to serve in the military is health and part is ideological.
Neta recalls the first meeting here: Passover week 2018. More than 4 years ago. She does not come every Friday and tries not to sink into despair and hold on to hope. No one expected the wall in Berlin to collapse. Hope we will all be here to see the change.
Suddenly my family arrives. My daughter, her partner and three grandchildren. Also their uncle Ori (who is also Shmulik’s son). They “float” around the circle but do not sit. Only Ori sits for a few moments and listens. When they decide to continue the trip, Ori asks to say something to the circle. He says he heard Jeff talk about a seed of hope. Ori says that the seed of hope sown here gives a reason for a better life to young people. Maybe he’ll come again.
Rami is coming
Roni talks about an initiative to create a program for the adoption of children in Gaza by outsiders, providing help in various fields. It’s a bit problematic to do it directly in front of someone in Israel because of the difficulty in transferring money, but it’s possible if it’s someone in the US. She checks.
Roni talks almost daily to a psychologist from the Trauma Center in Gaza, he is desperate!
Rami asks perhaps the solution is to allow Gaza residents who want it, migration to other places in the world. Why be bold and unidentified? It is better to be a refugee with the identity of the receiving country. They should be allowed to be open to the big world and choose a place to live there. Rami thinks Gaza is an illusion. A realistic horizon must be allowed, and in a situation in which Gaza is facing the world, its people must not be deceived. If you have a dream for another life and you are blocked in where you are, you can fulfill the dream in a place that allows.
Jeff says there is a Greek proverb that says a healthy society is formed when an old man plants a tree when he knows he will not be able to enjoy it. Jeff brings the corresponding phrase in the Mishna – “It is not upon you to finish the work.” Jeff’s dream is to live in an Israel where Radir Hani is her prime minister! From Roni he learned to love the enemies, and from Rami he learned that if you build a wall, you build it within your heart as well.
Rami says that he is not in favor of the idea that Radir will be only the prime minister of Israel, but the prime minister of all this place and all its inhabitants.
Although Radir was not here today, people think of her and Jeff and Rami also have plans for her.
Who did come today: Roni, Rami, Nahshi, Moshe, Ofek, Jeff, Mark, Keren, Neta, Oded and for a few moments also my family (Na’ama, Ilan, Gal, Amir, Shaked and Ori).
Wrote: Oded.

Then, in the car, on the way home, Nahshi said we need to formulate a procedure to form a circle with those who are in a hurry to continue on their way. Nahshi meant three women who came to walk in the sulfur factory and we, as was our custom, invited them to join. They did join in and settle down, but “on thorns.” On the one hand they were in a hurry to get to the center and prepare for Friday dinner with their families and on the other hand we were intrigued by the “phenomenon” of the strange circle they encountered. I introduced us and Roni told about her humanitarian activities for the boys and girls of the Gaza area. We then asked them to tell what Gaza is for them and their speech was very uncomfortable (regardless of content) because of the “thorns”.
Usually, the orderly speech in a circle creates a unique image for each session. We give space and time to guests to understand the rules. When it’s your turn to speak, it is already after you have had time to internalize the form in which the personal opinion is cast, any opinion, whatever it may be.
My feeling from the conversation with the three women, was of a miss. We could not make them realize that this was not an eccentric bunch, and they, out of time pressure, said the immediate clichés that came to mind just to please the circle. I guess that was also Nahshi’s feeling.
So what was said anyway: I, as mentioned, presented to them the background to our meeting at “Lighthouse” and what brought me personally, to act within its framework.
Roni recounted how born her the curiosity to know the narrative of the other people. About her many contacts with people in Gaza and her actions to help, support and give hope. Mostly out of pure humanity of concern for those who suffer from the ravages of fate and perhaps also out of a desire to present other faces of the nation to which she belongs. Her remarks aroused great appreciation among the three women.
For Lisa, Gaza is an unresolved hatred. Unilateral hatred, from them to us. They hate us. Her views were once at the political center of Israel. The son who served in the Border Guard changed his mind more to the right when he would describe to her what was happening to him in military service.
Dafna: Loves to travel. Rides with her husband on a motorcycle with a group of motorcyclists. This is how she became acquainted with the sulfur plant. Today she brought her friends (by car) with her. There are 2 million poor people in Gaza, she says. We have good intentions, but reality decides otherwise. They are not like us. When someone dies on our side, it’s the end of the world. With them when someone dies, his father stands, praising his son and preaching to die. With us it will never be like this.
Carmit served in the army in the area. Close to the strip and inside it. Familiar with the area. Nothing to say, she says, there, people suffer.
The three of them spoke briefly and got up to go.
They listened to Jaber standing half-turned in the direction of the vehicle. He introduced himself (a Bedouin from an “unrecognized” village) and told them that in his work as a bus driver, he had worked for a long time in the city from which they came, and he knows it well. Jaber talks about the difficult life in the unrecognized village and his decision to come into the circle because there are those who suffer even more.
The three women left.
Maharan says that “Gaza will explode in front of us.” The future does not bode well for him. There is a rapprochement between Russia and Hamas and the weapons that will be released from Ukraine will reach Gaza. The situation in the area is getting worse. Journalists are killed. The popular talk on the street, bad. This government is worse for Gaza than the previous one. The calm in Gaza does not bode well and the West Bank is boiling.
Yogev and Tal are friends of Ofek, he comes every week and they are occasional. Ofek surprises Yogev and asks him to present “his Gaza.”
Yogev releases a short sentence, “I like to listen. It’s good to listen to the opinions of others”
Ofek speaks. He builds a logical line. Gaza is a place where there are people. People are born equal. The conclusion – everyone deserves equal conditions. Gaza is near here, close to his home and therefore, says Ofek, their living conditions should be equal to his.
Maharan again takes the floor. This time the message is more optimistic. He met with a Gazan who is happy to be here and work. In Ramadan he returned to Gaza and felt suffocated. Returned to Israel and does not want to spend a day without a livelihood. According to Maharan, this government did the right thing by opening up the possibility of work for workers from Gaza. The economy is a crucial factor in people’s sense of calm. Once there is a good economic situation national respect is less dominant.
Ofek sang a song he composed to the words of Limor, Nahshi’s partner. He also accompanied the song with a guitar playing.

And we also talked about Zionism and flags, about the distribution of resources, about the territory of a kibbutz and its desecration, Jaber told about his experiences as a Muslim in a travel guide course. Hanan brewed dead jam and black pepper (brought a jar) and the covert fight between Shmulik and Nahshi over the coffee was made visible (this time Shmulik’s hand was on top).
We were this time: Roni, Jaber, Nahshi, Moshe, Shmulik, Maharan, Hanan, Yogev, Tal, Ofek, Malki, Dafna, Carmit, Lisa, Oded.
Wrote: Oded.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Eid al-Fitr at the end of Ramadan fasting. Tuesday evening, the eve of Remembrance Day. Wednesday Memorial Day. In the evening, on the eve of Independence Day. Thursday, Independence Day. Thursday night, three more victims in an insatiable conflict.
This is the “cargo” we brought to the lighthouse today.
Ronny is shocked by what Sinwar said. We saw the results in Elad, she says. Then she told about someone she had known closely in Gaza. She says they have, there in Gaza, a strong sense that something terrible is going to happen.
Mary also refers to Sinwar and says he always says the same things in different versions. This is indeed shocking, but not surprising.
Vivian says the world sees an unbalanced picture. She too, like Roni, is going through a difficult day and thought that coming to “Lighthouse” would be a bit relaxing.
Rami has spent a lot of time at home because of his illness and has time to keep up with attempts to link the events on the Temple Mount to threats from Gaza. A friend who visited him asked him: Suppose now that the residents of Gaza have complete freedom and they can move wherever they want, is there a connection of culture and heritage with the Palestinians in the West Bank? The question embarrassed him. If Gaza was emptied in 1917 of all its inhabitants by the Ottomans, and most of its inhabitants today are refugees or descendants of refugees from 1948, do they have a rooted affinity for Gaza or will they leave it for the most part as soon as they are allowed to? We, says Rami, talk a lot here about historic Gaza, Gaza which has been an important city throughout history. Are those who are now there, not in it mainly because they were caught up in it by force of war events and were actually imprisoned in it out of necessity? How many of them will choose Gaza as their place of residence if they are allowed complete freedom? To reinforce his words he mentions the Gazans who were or still are, in touch with us. Everyone, in one way or another, chose to leave Gaza and live somewhere else in the world.
In response to Rami’s remarks, Shmulik recounts a visit by Palestinian poet / writer / journalist Rimonda Twill to his Locality many years ago. She said her connection to Gaza is close. She has family there (she lives in Ramallah). Shmulik argues that this is a common trend among us to create two separate entities between the two territories. This is a clear political trend. Shmulik’s attitude to Gaza is an attitude of the here and now. History is in the background only. The question of how many will want to stay in Gaza if released is irrelevant.
After Shmulik I spoke. I argued that “the land belongs to us” should be changed to “we belong to the land.” Man is temporary and the earth is eternal. The same person who sanctifies the land on which his house is located, will die when his time comes (and is swallowed up by the land) and the land will belong to someone else. The “eternal” (earth), can contain the “temporary” (man). Temporary, can not contain the eternal. I “confess” that on the eve of Independence Day I have been at home, alone, for many years. This is no longer my holiday. I say I can not argue with emotional arguments. I may be missing the “patriotic gene”.
Malki, after we celebrated her birthday and raised a glass, hears my words and says we are in a pessimistic mood. She looks ahead and sees no ways to change. In the context of Independence Day, she has pride in what is being done here in the country, but there are also things that need to change. Malki looks around and there is no way to change. Religion, in her opinion, leads to irrational places that she has no way of dealing with. One should try to go other ways, but there is no one to lead. Today there is a demographic situation between the river and the sea where there are more “non-Jews” than Jews. We will be a minority. Two states for two peoples will not work if each party still continues to hope and dream that everything will be his. From the first day she came to the Lighthouse, she said she was in a constant state of despair. Despair that stems from the fact that even in the future, for the future, the conflict continues.
Moshe says that looking at facts also comes from emotion. He loves Independence Day but regrets the deportation. He prefers the name “War of the Commies” over “War of Independence.” In his view, that war is divided into two, one against the local Arabs and the other against the invasion of Arab armies. An invasion designed to eliminate our presence here. Our victory stemmed from our just feeling. Moshe emphasizes the invasion of the Arab armies and less the “Nakba”. The invaders did not fight out of affinity for the land and were therefore defeated. Extremism here and in Arab countries is religious and Moshe would like the conflict to become national again.
Ofek says he has no idea what the solution is, he just promises that he will continue to treat every person with respect as he is a person.
Tal thinks like Ofek … Tal goes to a pre-military preparatory school and aims for military service. He would like us to come and talk in his preparatory or they would come here. Tal does not think in terms of protecting land, it is important for him to protect people. The unit he aspires to be in fights rocket launchers. All his life he hears alarms and experiences missiles so he is glad he will have the opportunity to fight against their launchers. Against people and not necessarily for the land.
Mary volunteers at the Hashomer Hahadash organization and meets people of all shades. She’s there five years. She briefly explains about the organization. On the subject of “land,” she says, the sense of belonging is the engine for many things like nationality, religion and in general. Maybe because people are like a herd. The earth is an anchor for people to feel a sense of belonging.
Vivian upholds the Supreme Court ruling regarding the villages (shepherd communities) in the southern Hebron Mountains, from Safer Yatta. It’s another nail in our coffin. Another hopeless nail of the conflict. In today’s world, it’s hard to base a conversation on facts.
Roni adds that within the media reports it is difficult to objectively understand the background to the events. Only those who search can see things happening outside the mainstream. It does not justify, God forbid, violence and murder, but there are important nuances that are catalysts and one should look for them to understand the background.
Bella says she has no other country. Here the Jews were gathered from suffering. She does not want children, regardless of religion or nationality, to go through what she went through. There were times when life here was better, she says. We do not do to others what they have done to us.
Ilan has been to the lighthouse several times. Until now, just listen. It is difficult for him with the self-flagellation of the Jewish people. He does not bow his head at the siren and stands upright with the Bedouin and Ethiopians with whom he works. His difficulty is in mediating the situation to his children. He has no questions about his presence here. The human race has always been a herd. Currently without a shepherd. He had the “right” to be beyond the fence, where he acted contrary to the education by which he grew up. The Lebanon War was a “clear” war, to protect the northern settlements. Objective and understandable goal, there were no dilemmas. In Gaza it is not clear. Although he did not keep family or friends in the north (Ilan was born and raised in a kibutz near Gaza), he was clear about what to do. The key word is “management”. We have no management! It’s not that there are “two sides” here, there is simply no management! He reads from a letter sent by his mother Mirhaleh, who also often comes to the “lighthouse.” The song she sent is by Muhammad Darwish.
Rami “closes” the circle. Heard of a Bedouin segment: if we want to get to something we need to create a straight line there. I, says the Bedouin, one hand on the reins and one hand on the plow. If I get out of concentration, the plow will make a curved line on its own. In conclusion, one should mark a horizon and concentrate on it. It may require parting from the “correct ” and the “proper”. A new discourse needs to be produced.
We were: Bella, Vivian, Roni, Mary, Tal, Ofek, Moshe, Malki, Nahshi, Shmulik, Oded, Rami, Ilan, Ziv, Keren, Golan.
Wrote: Oded

On the way to the sulfur factory (Shmulik, Nahshi, Moshe), we thought of placing the table on the hill, under a tree. In the distance we saw a loving couple, we parted and smiled with a look, and went down, to our drinking stone.
Nahshi began preparations for the coffee, and the ideological discussion heated up with the coffee, around the question of how to cook it. Lucky that Ofek arrived and made sure to hang the peace kite. And with the completion of the set and the preparation of the coffee, Roni joined.
Will we win guests today, after “Night-al-Qader”?
The pair of lovers on the hill finished their work and were invited to join our forces but politely refused (perhaps angrily at the fact that we had disturbed their loneliness).
Suddenly, crowds of hikers flocked to us: the joy of their arrival mingled with fear of a shortage of benches and mugs, but the lighthouse vision transcended any distress.
It was a battalion of travelers, most of them from Ashdod and the southern region, led by a guide named Shlomi. Due to their (lack of) time, most critics were unable to answer the question “What is Gaza for me?” But the spirit of things reflected a mixture of longing for the days when some of those present walked the strip, and feared another “round” of fire.
Meanwhile, the round, the good round, resumed: Shmulik served coffee and reiterated everyone’s right to self-determination. In his case: a communist-individualist.
Roni told about the personal bond that was forged between her and residents across the fence, about the possibility of helping people who want to work, about understanding and friendship in times of hostility and anger.
Mark arrived and Shmulik dedicated a song to him, ahead of his upcoming birthday.
Malki, Bella, Dina and her brother Yossi, and later Limor, Maharan and Arieh, also enriched the circle with songs, flowers, references to Holocaust Remembrance Day, as well as interesting insights into the place of Gaza and the difficulty of creating other communication between the two sides of the fence.
Speaking of communication, a moment of joy: Roni managed to connect us with our Gazan friend.
When it was Ofek’s turn, he chose to sing another piece by Shmulik that Ofek composed and garnered applause.
All of those moments of sadness and joy was watched by Avi, a docu-filmmaker who documented the meeting and also took care to challenge the circle with poignant questions.
We were: Shmulik, Ofek, Roni, Mark, Malki, Dina, Yossi, Limor, Maharan, Avi, Arie, Nahshi, Moshe.
Wrote: Moshe, helped by Nahshi, who also made coffee (until he was fired by Shmulik), completed his bread and made an observation from the smoking area.
Photographed by: Nahshi, Limor and Avi.